Finding Roots in a Fast-Paced World | Part 2

Written By Julie Brown

New Year, Old You

Fast fashion, new tech, more productivity, new you. Fast, more, new... 

In this world of fast fashion, AI-powered productivity, and rapid-cycling trends, it can be so hard to experience your life and express your identity in ways that feel meaningful and authentic. In a social media-powered culture, the unspoken value has become “acceptability”⸺ the way you part your hair, the way you wear your jeans… when did it become a social crime to look like a millennial? 

But listen. The allure of trends has an evolutionary basis in our psyches. We have an instinct to follow trends to demonstrate that we belong in the herd, to signal affiliation, and gain social capital. Each and every one of our psyches comes packaged with a need to belong– our survival as humans is based upon it. So when we see others exhibiting signs of a new trend, the brain registers this as a survival shortcut, and dopamine is released when we participate. Dopamine – that good ol’ neurotransmitter associated with motivation and reward-seeking, but not necessarily pleasure from said reward– more like, the anticipation of it. You can see how this might lead to issues of addiction when the hit comes from the chase more than contentment. When we participate in and receive acknowledgement for being “acceptable,” behave as if we’re in the in-group, and cross tasks off the to-do list, the dopamine hit reinforces the behavior, making it more likely for us to come back for more. But is that real, deep, meaningful living…?

Now, you might be reading this thinking, “I don't care about social acceptability, maybe this isn’t for me.” But, I would bet that the idea of revitalizing the way you experience life could be appealing regardless of your social interests. If so, I would challenge you to sit with the core concept of following the playbook of the group you desire affiliation with. Maybe your trend isn’t about fashion, maybe it’s the latest gadget, or that hot new author, or keeping up with the latest news drop or video game release. We are all following some version of a social map that keeps us connected to the herd of our choosing. And every herd is experiencing faster and faster social turnover. So how do we cultivate authenticity in such a rapidly changing world? It seems to me that we’re all due for a perspective shift. 

In my previous post, Standing At the Threshold, we explored the ideas of pausing and listening– seeing the New Year as a move into new territory in which we may expand, as opposed to “doing” and “checklisting.” Well, this month, let’s take the idea of authentic expansion of the self a little bit further. Authenticity is rarely the sparkly little trick that draws a crowd. Most often, it’s found in the low hum of a well-rooted internal ecosystem. All of those past versions of you, the mechanisms we’ve formed to survive, the memories of what did and didn’t work in life? Those aren’t “cringe” bits of garbage to be cast away from our awareness. Not all all– they’re compost. The thing is, what we refuse to integrate doesn’t simply disappear. It actually waits under the surface for an often inconvenient moment to resurface. When we break down our most organic moments however, extract the meaning, learn the lesson, and retain the felt sense of who we were in those instances, we improve the very structure of our internal soil. Compost may not smell like a day spa– it’s dense and earthy, but it’s alive. By reflecting on what has worked AND what has not, what we enjoy AND dislike most deeply, we integrate the whole of our experiences, find our roots, and embody the full scope of authenticity. 

Now there is nothing wrong with truly enjoying trends. Being a connoisseur of fashion and other aspects of culture can involve dropping deeply into art and authentic creativity, but as this world of ours accelerates, we can forget that before the noise, there was silence. Technology is not our enemy, but the acceleration of it seems to outpace our natural rhythms at times. While silence or meditation can be scary or (gasp!) boring for many, it actually has a profound neurogenic impact on brain health, supporting cognitive functioning and ameliorating stress levels. It allows for more focused information-processing, regulating, and even generativity of new cells. So, if your goal as we begin a new season is to thrive, consider the concept of dropping more deeply into your internal world instead of trying to keep up with the pace of the external one. The richest ecosystems have taken decades, even centuries, to develop, and this slow growth is profoundly true of the nature of embodied selfhood too. 

Maybe you’re thinking that this sounds easier said than done. After all, trauma, depression, and anxiety are all painful experiences that many folks would give anything to hit the mute button on. So, this concept of composting and integrating the old instead of casting it away is not a comfortable one for many. But keeping the old in order to embrace the new is the plot twist, integration is the reward of the hard work. And that is where the help of a trusted friend or therapist can come in. Your nervous system may need the borrowed safety of another person in order to begin this work, and that is okay. This can be a rich step in the process of standing firmly on your own two feet, in your own two shoes, shining in all of your very own authentic glory. 

Start small. Start today. Your roots are waiting! 

And if you find that tending them feels overwhelming or uncertain, you don’t have to do it alone. Reach out today.

_________________

Sources

Julie Brown
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New Year, Old You? | Part 1